Four Little Words

If you've ever taken the first Ruhi book, there's a good chance you know this quotation:

“The betterment of the world can be accomplished through pure and goodly deeds, through commendable and seemly conduct.”

It's right there in the first section of the first unit. I've studied it, memorised it, talked about it, and probably quoted it more times than I can count. It's one of those passages that has become so familiar that I don't always stop and think about it anymore.

But recently I did, and what caught my attention were four little words: pure, goodly, commendable and seemly. At first they seem almost redundant. Pure and goodly deeds? Commendable and seemly conduct? Isn't Baha'u'llah basically saying that the betterment of the world comes about when we do good things and behave well?

Well, yes. But why use four different words to say it?

And, as always, this is just my own understanding, nothing official. If it helps you think about the quotation in a new way, great. If not, no problem.

The first thing I noticed is that the four words aren't simply strung together. They're divided into two pairs: pure and goodly deeds, commendable and seemly conduct. And, at first, the pairs almost seem backwards to me. I would have expected a person to have pure and goodly conduct, while their individual deeds might be commendable and seemly.

But then I started thinking about the difference between a deed and conduct. A deed is something I do. Conduct is how I carry myself. A deed can take just a moment, while conduct seems to describe something broader, maybe the manner in which I move through the world and interact with the people around me. I’m not actually sure about that last part, but it sounds good for now. Once I began looking at the words that way, the pairings didn't seem backwards at all.

Purity comes first, and once again it begins with the heart. I’ve said this countless times, and it's true here, too. Everything in the Writings, it seems, begins with the heart. Before I ever do anything, there is the reason I am doing it. Am I really trying to help someone, or am I just hoping they'll notice how helpful I am? Am I giving because I want to give, or because I want other people to see me giving? The actions may look exactly the same from the outside, but depending on what is happening in my heart, they can be very different.

Then comes goodly. A pure motive doesn't necessarily produce a good action. I can sincerely want to help you and still make an absolute mess of things. We've probably all done that at one time or another. They say that the road to hell is paved with good intentions, so good intentions aren't enough. Some of the most horrific things in history occurred because people genuinely believed they were doing good. Nope. The deed itself has to be good.

Then Baha'u'llah moves from deeds to conduct, from what we do to the way we carry ourselves while doing it.

The first word He uses is commendable. Something commendable is worthy of praise, thank you Mr Dictionary. It’s the sort of behaviour we’re happy to see in someone else, and maybe even want to imitate. This becomes particularly interesting when the deed itself is already good, because I can do something genuinely helpful and still behave terribly while doing it. I can give someone money while making them feel small for needing it. I can offer good advice in a condescending way. I can serve on a committee, do everything I've promised to do, and make everyone else miserable in the process. The deed may be good, but my conduct is less so.

And then we come to seemly. It's an odd little word. I don’t think I’ve ever heard anyone use it in a conversation, except as part of this quote. We use its opposite, though, “unseemly”, but something being “seemly”? Not so much.

As I understand it, something seemly is fitting. (Thank you Mr Dictionary, once again.) Appropriate. Suited to the circumstances. And suddenly I can see why Baha'u'llah uses it to describe conduct rather than deeds. The question isn't only whether the thing I'm doing is good. It's whether the way I'm behaving is appropriate at the moment. “Not everything that a man knoweth can be disclosed, nor can everything that he can disclose be regarded as timely, nor can every timely utterance be considered as suited to the capacity of those who hear it.” (Thank you, Baha’u’llah.)

Imagine someone who is grieving. I may sincerely want to comfort them, and I may want to share something beautiful about the life of the soul. I may speak gently and lovingly, with all the care I can muster. But perhaps they just need me to sit there and listen. The words I want to say may be wonderful, and there may come a time when they will be exactly what is needed. Just not now.

Teaching the Faith offers all sorts of examples of this, too. I can sincerely want to share something that has transformed my own life, and I can do it respectfully and lovingly. But if the person in front of me is trying to tell me about the worst day they've had in years, maybe this isn't the moment for me to launch into an explanation of progressive revelation. Maybe I need to listen.

So, for my own use, I tend to think of the quotation as saying, “Do the right thing, for the right reason, in the right way, at the right time.” And yes, I know I've reversed the first two. I think it sounds better that way. Sue me.

What I particularly like about this is how easy it is to get one of those parts wrong. I can do the right thing for the wrong reason, or the wrong thing for the best of reasons. I can do the right thing for the right reason and make a complete mess of the way I do it. And I can get all three of those right and still choose the worst possible moment. I’ve probably managed each of those at some point. No, I’m probably too humble there. I know I’ve managed each of those numerous times.

So, let’s go back to the beginning of the quotation: “The betterment of the world…”

That's quite something to expect from our deeds and conduct.

We talk a lot about changing the world, and the problems facing it can seem so enormous that it's difficult to imagine what any one of us can possibly do about them. But Baha'u'llah brings it right back down to the things we do every day and the way we carry ourselves while doing them. A single deed. Our conduct. The state of our heart. The effect we have on the person standing in front of us.

Maybe that’s what I’ve been missing all this time. The betterment of the world happens through the person standing in front of us.

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Oh, and for those who are wondering, I haven't forgotten about my goal of a hundred articles. I think I have 75 to go. I'll double check, but I'm pretty sure it's 75 to go.

So, to try and catch up and achieve that goal, I'm now aiming for three articles a week, published on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. Let's see how I do.